Folks, we know that our reports sometimes sound unbelievable or at least stretched. We appreciate you trusting that we're doing our best to describe exactly what we're doing and experiencing.
So ... I need to beg your further indulgence. It's about to get even stranger.
We haven't posted much in the past couple of days because e and I -- and our friends K and c -- have found ourselves exploring some unexpectedly deep corners of the mind. We've delved into areas I didn't even know existed.
OK, I was a Boy Scout once, and I'm holding up my right hand in the proper salute as I promise you this: I've just interviewed two subconsciouses. By voice, by IM.
I've heard directly from the alter egos of e and of c, who until a few weeks ago had spent most of their lives locked 'inside' and unreachable. Hypnotic trance brought them out to speak for the first time.
They both had remarkably similar things to say about their roles, their lives, what they control, what they remember and what they crave. Meanwhile, the conscious e and c are almost entirely in the dark about these conversations; still today they know only what we've told them.
What these two submissive women's subconsciouses have said has implications for anyone thinking of gaining hypnotic control over such a woman. That happens to be the narrow focus of this blog. But I suspect that their messages have wider meaning too, for anyone interested in the mind and its mysteries.
But before we cue the spooky music, I want to tell you how we got to this stage. It's too big a jump from "Let's see if I can hypnotize you" to "Um, I have a message from your secret twin."
***
As you know if you've been reading along (or have clicked some of the earlier links at right), e and I have been gradually exploring all these wild hypnotic effects, which she has responded to quite effortlessly, almost from day one.
While I may be in charge, I'm not magic. I know it's some part of her mind, under my direction, that is actually delivering all these amazing effects.
* Keeping track of her hypno body modifications, so that every time e looks in the mirror she sees her collar, or every time she rolls over in bed she hears her slave bells.
* Remembering to replace Sinatra's voice with mine whenever e turns on the car radio.
* Blocking that extremely embarrassing memory for as many hours or days as I want.
* Weaving extremely authentic settings (beaches, amusement parks, rainforests, dungeons, yachts) for various play scenes.
* Keeping track, over months, of a dozen or so "triggers," shorthand terms that I've given to fairly elaborate scenes.
That's pretty impressive work. Over time, I began to picture this second entity inside her, acting as my agent, acting as my co-conspirator.
I started directing little asides to it, saying thanks. It didn't reply.
Then one time, when an erotic effect and a phone call from e's mother coincided, nearly causing mayhem, it occurred to me to wonder if we were playing with a proper net. We had the usual BDSM limits all listed, but I wondered if we were insured against indirect, accidental damages.
After all, I realized, I could make e forget the name of her employer. Bad. Or strip in front of her boss. Rarely a good thing. I could make her orgasm in front of friends and family. She'd never get over it.
Now, there's no way that these are behaviors she'd ordinarily tolerate. She's as proper and successful and respected as anyone you know.
So a few weeks ago I finally got around to asking the "hidden observer" the obvious question:
D: Will you follow all my orders, regardless of consequences?
e: yes
I switched back to the conscious e:
D: ok i have news.
e: oh?
D: you'll follow all my orders, regardless of consequences.
e: ohhh no *blush*
In other words, whatever this entity was, it was not e. No mention of our agreed limits. No hesitation about following me off a cliff. And it had the power to carry out any order.
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2 comments:
This is where my concerns are. Who is this other e? Is the subconscious really the true being, or not? Can this be healthy splitting the two? Not to mention all of the triggers that you have to remember.
Many people wish for total submission, some are indeed slaves, other submissive, but there are degrees of submission and limits that each person has to decide whether to cross or not. Does the subconscious affirm the limits that someone has? If the conscious has a different limit, is that the limit that should not be crossed?
I wanted to post Part 2 before attempting to answer this. Now you can sense a bit of where I'm coming from.
* Both e2 and c2 act like separate entities with their own self-knowledge since birth, basically. So, unless there is something monumentally rare about these two women, my working assumption is that many people (all submissives? all of us?) are constructed the same way.
* I think it's not useful to debate whether one or the other is the true being. They're "both" inside, their roles overlap, and one sits behind, the fairly powerless observer, while the other sits at the wheel, usually unaware of the backseat driver. Oooh I think I'll hang on to that metaphor.
* Should I start referring to e and c as having multiple personalities? I'm reluctant to, because of all the baggage that term carries. If they have multiple personalities, then so do many, many other people.
* e2 says it's no big deal to keep track of all the triggers.
* Whose limits are in effect? It's a little surprising to discover that subconscious and conscious can play with different rules. Obviously the BDSM 'code' didn't account for this. Equally obvious is that nearly all of us will adhere to the most conservative set of limits.
* The real risk I see in e2 following orders regardless of consequence is that, when something goes awry, she may follow the rules instead of my wishes. The accidents can be amusing (thank goodness for that towel on the couch yesterday) but could just as easily be quite harmful.
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